a poem a day for a year #30

by Amy Turn Sharp


I studied German in college

just for the hot blonde boys

all lined up pretty in a row

philosophy majors

my biggest downfall

ever

 

I also had been to the the Hofbräuhaus House

that summer before college

drunk against Munich

I loved the harsh clip sound

tut throaty mouths

back of throat

firing long winding words my way

clinking glasses

saying the word trinkin

into the night

Ich bin mude

my hands held tightly

to the train seat

I sped through the German night

I mapped memories

I dreamed drunk cognates

 

 

but I never clicked it

the German

I went to class and loved Frau B

my teacher

she coddled me

but I never got it

like the others

 

I would stare out of the large clear windows of Ellis hall

and at some point in the following year

it was good enough to just get by

it was fine to have been dumped all over

by one of the blonde boys

nothing mattered

I had discovered the word

Schadenfreude

and I carved it into my wooden seat

and touched it every time he fumbled in class

I took my fingernail to the word wood groove

every time he sounded like a dick

it soothed me like a tic